Gack.

i am not going to post again until the weekend unless things get a lot worse.

i want to go back home. i hate the school here. the teachers are dumbasses, the high schoolers are friggin mean (i guess they're nicer when they're forced to share a school with you), and the dress code is dumb.

i mean, seriously. no facial hair for guys? hairstyles must not be distracting? what is this, hairspray?

and don't call me a whiny bitch. i already know that.

it's just...this is TORTURE. it's like a prison. now i understand why hallie palmer dropped out.

aah. god. i'm done, for now.

Public School Systems Suck

they should have written it in the constitution. everyone in the system agrees.

public schools suck. a lot.

i have a crazy teacher that i have for three classes (is that unbelievable?) and then a coupla a nice teachers and then this one that hates me.

what did i do? i don't even KNOW her. she doesn't even know ME.

like i said. everything should be private from now on, or like my old school.

Woweegee.

i haven't been on in a while. wow. i didn't notice.

aaaaaaaaaaaanyway. onto the bigger stuff. the cousins aren't as horrendous as i remember them. they're acting okay.

the move's going better. i met some people. however, i have this horrible internal conflict that you're about to hear about. (my life's better than the o.c. trust me on this one.)

i met this group o' guys and a few girls. one of the guys reaaaally likes me.

but. but, but, but. this group o' guys is the kind that i despise. you know the kind. the kind of guys that think they know everything, think they can get any girl, kinda skaterish, SEEM like they would be the perfect boyfriend (vickers: think ian and his little crowd).

they're actually kind of nice once you get to know them. but they're completely and totally clique-ish.

and there's the little fact that i only like this guy that reaaally likes me as a friend.

i mean, come one. he was my first friend here. first friends are NOT supposed to become boyfriends. it should be an unwritten rule.

maybe they can when they're like, 21 or something, after becoming best friends and the best friend sprouts some attractiveness, but then you're supposed to be a romantic comedy.

and then i actually like his other friend that's prolly a year younger than me, but totally sweet and nice and sensitive and not gay like you'd think all sweet, nice, sensitive young men are.

does this not suck? or am i being completely and totally superficial?

anyway.

i had a sad moment earlier today. i saw sisterhood of the traveling pants (2).

i've got a pair of traveling pants, you know. one of my friends signed the back pocket (he shall remain unnamed...) and said: "i own your ass!!!"

so i can't wear them to school. oh well. i don't think i was going to, anyway.

okay, so random subject: you should always have books that you want to read again and again. and authors that write the books that you want to read again and again. my titles include: peaches, by jodi lynn anderson; gossip girl: the carlyles (my guilty pleasure, along with many other books) by cecily von ziegar; the year of secret assignments, by a person who i can't remember the name of; prom, by laurie halse anderson; speak, by laurie halse anderson; twisted, by laurie halse anderson; all the alex rider books by anthony horowtiz. and many more.....

likewise, there should be movies you want to see again and again. i have less of those: roman holiday (best movie EVER), ocean's 11 (1960 and 2001 versions), death at a funeral, pretty much anything with audrey hepburn, and many more.

back onto my hopefully non-existent love life.

so. the guy that reaaaally likes me (we'll call him "bob") knows i'm not interested in a relationship. the part he doesn't know is that i'm only not interested in a relationship with him.

i'm a jerk. i screwed up.

but the thing is, i can't take hurting people. it's inevitable, but i'd rather be the one to get hurt. it doesn't show in any of my previous relationships (the longest of which was about three weeks. or two months. i lost track, but it's still not very long. anyway, i broke up with all the guys, excluding the one where we grew apart and he came out of the closet, and it hurt them alot), but, a lot of stuff doesn't show in my previous relationships.

it's good to let all this out. everyone should get a blog at some point in their life when things are stressful.

i suck.

onto other things, now.

i had surgery yesterday. i love anaesthesia, but only while it's working. afterward, it sucks.

it made me nauseated and tired and gave me a headache. ugh. i can still feel the after effects.

lets talk about the presidential stuff!

i'm a democrat, liberal, and in full support of barack obama.

i like john mccain though. he's got a good sense of humor. did anyone see him on saturday night live?

anyway. this is not a reason i'm supportive of barack obama, but a friend of the family used to go to school with him.

i support his political ideas, and the way he's making presidential election promises to concentrate on alternative forms of energy.

i would say "onto other things," but i'm afraid i've run out of things to say.

surprising, huh?

well, i've got a lot of surprises.

and one of them is that the ghost thing on vickers' blog, rock and roll, completely and totally FREAKED ME OUT. and not in a good way.

my sister's afraid of ghosts. i think she instilled the fear in me. or maybe it was the video.

it's just that, i've been seeing a lot of ghost videos lately. well, not a lot, but enough to scare me. i'm not superstitious, i just get freaked out easily.

has anyone ever seen that one ghost video of that hispanic ghost who died and people got in a car crash because of her? and now the vickers thing...

ack. now i'm freaked out. gotta go watch some college humor stuff on youtube. (shakes)

Tear...

i've been in mourning for four days now.

why? i finished breaking dawn on august third, 2008, at around 8:00 a.m. reading time: 1 a.m. to 3 a.m., short sleeping break, 7 a.m. to 8 a.m.

i cringed at least 12 times in that book.

so. i am just going to forget breaking dawn and make up my own ending for the first three books.

at least bella was turned, though.